My familia!

Thursday, December 18

Oh, those teen years

Growing up, I had my share of good friends and not so good friends. I had friends that would start out sweet only to cut ties and gossip about my dreams and secrets as a joke to other girls. I had friends that would only call me when their 'other friends' were unavailable. I also had friends that would steal from me, and still continue to act as a friend. But I also had some amazing friends that stuck up for each other. And yes, unfortunately, I also found myself playing small/large parts in all of these scenarios. Hindsight is definitely 20/20.

Without these friends, both good and bad, hopefully we gals realize how to treat people and appreciate one another. And we have learned from our mistakes...hopefully.

So anyway, the reason I bring this up, is I have found myself trying to give advice to my teenage daughter. She is having some issues with a few of her friends. She is also very moody and distant. Brent and I have noticed something changing for a few weeks now, and last night I was able to sit her down and talk about some of the things going on in school and such. And she finally opened up. It seems that she is fighting what she knows morally knows is right vs. peer pressure. She is also being accused of something that started with a misunderstanding.

And I am fighting every inch of myself not to tell her what to do. She knows what is right, and all I can do is listen and give advice. She will need to make the decisions herself, right or wrong.

It kills me to know what she is going to go through and the hurt feelings that she will have. Am I a bad mother for 'letting' her go through this? I guess I don't see it this way. Without those girlfriends of mine who wronged me in some way, I would not have learned how to be a good person. And without me making some wrong decisions, and hurting others, I would not have learned the pain of seeing their faces. We all need to go through that to a point. I just need to be a good listener so she feels that she will always have someone to talk to.